So, for January, I have decided to make it a point to work at least 30 hours a week. I'm on my way to clocking in 11 hours just for this week (7 hours yesterday, 3 today), and I'm burned out. I'm wondering if I should limit myself to just the six hours per day, or if I should go over. In theory, going over is better (more productive) but I find myself so depressed at the fact that I can't even play a game of Spider Solitaire in peace because the Responsible Part of my brain is nagging me to go do some more work.

I'm thinking I should space breaks in between working but I have a tendency to go on a break and not get back to work at the end of said break.

What to do, what to do.

stolen from signifiers, who seems to be a fun meme provider:

Full disclosure: ask me a question, suggest a topic, leave a comment. I will respond in a video post to the best of my abilities.

I have never been gifted at making videos, on account of I am always awkward, but maybe I got better at it. IDK. Keep it classy, flist.

stolen from signifiers:

Comment with a word and I will type that word into iTunes and upload my favorite song that includes that word.

Holiday Love Meme
My Thread!

I just got home, but I am going to spend part of my Saturday night commenting on everyone's. I really missed this anonymous meme thing on LiveJournal. The rest of the Internet tends to be a little poisonous, if I am being honest.


also, because i don't know where else to say this:
i kind of really adore you.

 

I don't know why, but sometimes I think I can tell when a relationship becomes really strained. And, I don't mean that in the romantic sense, but in the we-used-to-be-such-good-friends sense. I don't understand why you are being the way that you are. I don't understand why it suddenly feels like you cannot stand talking to me anymore, or why it feels like I have to watch my words so much when I talk to you.

I'm trying to retrace our history, piecing things together, rewinding the conversations we've had. And I'm trying to figure out if the last one we had was filled with things that I said that you didn't appreciate. Or the one before that, or the one before that. I don't understand.

Sometimes, I feel bad because it feels like people are constantly getting tired of me, and I can't do anything about it. I mean, I'm just being me.

There are certain people who stick around, and who give me loads of chances, and I really, truly love them for that. I've had way too many phases in my life where I have pushed people away by being relentlessly poisonous and toxic and negative. I've had so many phases where I shut everybody out just because having them around felt like too much to deal with. And yet. They are still here.

For the rest of the people in my life, what I would want is to know for certain if you are the kind of person who will stick around, or if the kind of person who will dissolve into a place where all you can seem to muster when we cross paths in a bookstore—after years of best friendship followed by years of time apart—is a 'Hi, we're going to have a look around now, see you,' or if you are the kind of person who will act antagonistic for no reason and then disappear forever.

I'm just so tired of trying on people and then finding out that they don't fit right.

( +87. sorry D: )

That was heftier, but funner, like I promised. Funner is a word now, I realize because my LJ's spell check recognizes it.

...Aaaand I'm gone.

BUT NOT BEFORE I SAY THAT THE WORLD IS SO HOT HERE. 31°!!! THAT IS IN CELSIUS, PEOPLE. Yahoo says it "feels like" 107° F which translates to 41° C. I don't mean to whine. Since I have a house and all and it's not like. Prison or the streets or the slums or whatever, but dear goodness, it's freaking hot. I guess that's summer for you.

my lolo reading rogue. as in the magazine.
hee. :> he asked my brother for other issues after.
he's the awesomest, i love him.


SOME THINGS I MUST DO THIS WEEK:
(for my own sake)

• TUBE friggin' magazine.
• semiotics readings
• philo review (might get called for recitation!)
• non-fic review (might get called for recitation!)
• produce 8 products from type class for advanced graphic design class

I hope you're all OK! I'm OK, but I resolved to drink more water each day because I noticed my skin was breaking a lot and thought maybe it had to do with water intake. And now my tummy feels funny. It's not very pleasant. Other than that, well, I don't feel very Christmas-y yet, but I'll be breaking into my Christmas songs in a few days, wait and see.

If any of you have Christmas playlists up, let me know.